The Georges in Peru


21 Apr 2016

 Last night was kind of a sad one.  Mia and Sarah were helping me take Amy to the bathtub and she suddenly got scared and started punching me with her right arm (the only thing she can move).  “Mom!  That’s Dad you are hitting!” (don't worry, she can't hit very hard)  It was sad on so many levels, partly for Sarah and Mia to see their mom deteriorate so much that she’d not realize that she was hitting their dad, and Amy being so scared because she is so helpless (can’t see, or walk).  She seemed apologetic today and I felt bad that she couldn't even apologize, but I told her I forgave her and knew she wouldn't have hit me if she had known it was me.

This morning I had to walk out of our team meeting when they were singing because they sang 10,000 Reasons and the last verse says:  

"And on that day
When my strength is failing
The end draws near
And my time has come
Still my soul will
Sing Your praise unending
Ten thousand years
And then forevermore
And I just couldn’t take it.
Sorry to write such a bummer blog today.  On a good note, Amy drank very well this afternoon, taking in about 500 ml of water and Powerade, and she's still drinking well.  Time to get some more Powerade.

About the same

20 Apr 2016

Amy is doing about the same as yesterday.  Still not eating, but getting a little fluid in via a sippy cup.  

My computer is slowly being restored.  Everything seems to be recoverable, it's just a slow process to download it all.  

Thanks for all of your encouraging emails.  Sorry I don't respond to all of them.  I do get them and appreciate them.

Time to help Mia study physics.

Computer Crash!

19 Apr 2016

Today, I attempted to upgrade the operating system on my laptop and it crashed mid-upgrade and stopped functioning.  I ended up having to erase the hard drive and reload everything from remote backup, which means it will be a few days before everything is restored.

Amy is more alert today, despite hardly drinking and not eating.  She's talking better than she has for a day or two.


18 Apr 2016

I've felt plenty of helplessness since November when Amy's MRI showed her brain tumor had returned.  But my feelings of helplessness have gone up another notch in the last few days.  Amy has gotten so weak that she can only speak in a slurred whisper, so we can't even understand what she wants.  Basically, anytime she tries to speak, I give her a drink from her sippy cup.  It's about the only thing I can do now.   We try hard to interpret what she is saying, but usually we can't understand her, which is frustrating for all parties.


17 Apr 2016

Today Amy has been markedly calmer.  Her heart rate has gone down to the 120s.  This morning she even requested a bath, the first rational and understandable thing she's said in the last 2 days.  I'm not sure if she is shouting less because she is having difficulty talking, or because she is more comfortable, but it is a nice thing.  She looks more comfortable than she has been in weeks.  She is whispering a lot when she tries to talk.   Weight is down to 47.1kg. 

Tachycardic and Calm

16 Apr 2016

Amy didn't eat anything today.  She drank about 700 ml of water (1 teaspoon at a time), but didn't have any urine output.  Her heart keeps going at about 135-140 beats per minute, yet she is fairly calm as she lies in bed, which is amazing to me, since I have to run pretty hard to get my heart rate up that high.  It's been beating like that for over 24 hours now.  

The kids have all been super at helping take care of her and helping around the house.  Today they repainted most of the kitchen!

Not eating or drinking

15 Apr 2016

Today Amy didn't drink much and only ate two bites of food.  She just couldn't seem to coax her throat to swallow today.  At 9 pm tonight, she is breathing at 42 respirations per minute and her heart rate is about 130.  She's agitated and not speaking, though she was jabbering a lot earlier today, even just 2 hours ago.  The worst is, she seems like she wants something but can't communicate what it is.

Eating and Drinking

14 Apr 2016

Today Amy ate a bit more today and drank nearly a liter of water and tea.  She was a bit more understandable and lucid tonight, but then suddenly has become verbally unresponsive and is snoring comfortably in bed.  She requested a lot of different foods today:  grapes, potatoes, corn chips, granola, icecream, raisin bread, cheese, etc.  However, granola is the only thing that she'll eat more than 2 bites.  She's hard to feed, since she can't swallow well.  I think these birds (rufous-collared sparrows) that I found in our blackberry bush in our front yard this morning would be easier to get food into!



13 Apr 2016

Today Amy woke up a bit more conversant than usual, but still quite confused most of the time and her speech is so slurred she is hard to understand.  She even commented on her own speech.  "I sound like a frog!"  

The Reuters, former hospice nurses-turned missionaries, came and sat with her for a couple of hours around midday and also got her a sippy cup from their stash as grandparents to help her drink without spilling on herself.  She ate two bites of waffle at breakfast and a small portion of Aunt Edith's Apple Cobbler (we don't know who Aunt Edith is either) for lunch.  She doesn't seem to be in much pain, except she complains of her neck being sore whenever we move her.  During lunch another missionary, Sue Querfeld, came and sat with her so the rest of us could eat together as a family.  Thanks to all three of you for your help!

Deuteronomy 4:9-10

12 Apr 2016

Today, my devotional time was on Deuteronomy 4. (I'm going through Numbers and Deuteronomy right now)  Verses 9 and 10 say, "Only be careful, and watch yourselves closely so that you do not forget the things your eyes have seen or let them slip from your heart as long as you live.  Teach them to your children and to their children after them."  I think one of the most encouraging things that people have written me that they are praying for is for our kids to not lose their faith through this time.  This isn't an easy thing to explain to the kids.  Yes, I know God has a reason, but I don't know what it is yet, and can't tell my kids with confidence what it is.  Sure, someone might become a Christian because of this, or someone else might avoid some future suffering that they don't even know looms ahead, but I don't know what it is.  So please keep praying that my kids and I don't let the things we've seen God do before this trial 'slip from our hearts as long as we live.'

Amy's had a rough day.  She is getting dehydrated and not eating well.  She's losing her ability to swallow and can no longer see, which makes eating that much more difficult.  When we try to sit her up she often seizes or passes out.  'Why don't you put in an IV?' some of you might be asking.  Before Amy was delirious she clearly stated she'd want an IV if she was nauseated and couldn't keep from vomiting, but not if she was no longer lucid or comatose.  Just because we can prolong her life doesn't mean that we should.   What good would putting in an IV bring?  But when we ask questions like that, we have to ask ourselves, 'What good does hovering over her throughout the day encouraging water, mangos, cereal, bread with honey, and apple pie bring?'  Somehow that seems right, so we continue to encourage nibbles of those things, though we recognize that we are really doing those things for ourselves not for her.


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